When Is It Time to Take a Relationship Hiatus? 6 Signs Before Giving Up Dating
Almost everyone has been there before: you’re dating someone, and it just isn’t working. The chemistry is gone, the conversations are stale, and you can’t help but feel like you’re wasting your time.
So what do you do? Should you break up with them or take a break from dating altogether?
If you’re kind, smart, and financially independent and think you deserve better, here’s dating coach Evan Marc Katz to share signs that it might be time for a relationship hiatus.
- You have a “dating fatigue” experience.
- You have trust issues.
- You’re afraid to settle down.
- Your self-esteem is suffering.
1. You’re too desperate to date.
If you’re too desperate to find love, you might inadvertently put too much pressure on yourself and your dates. This can make it harder to relax and be yourself, which is essential for any relationship to thrive.
If you’re feeling sad about your love life, maybe it’s time to take a hiatus from dating. Instead of frantically searching for Mr. Right, spend time enjoying your own company and living your life to the fullest.
2. You keep meeting the wrong people.
You are in a long-distance relationship, and he talks about himself the whole time. You meet someone at a party, and you just don’t click. You’ve swiped right on hundreds of people on dating apps, but you’re not on the same page.
Why is it that you always end up meeting the wrong people?
The reason for this is two-fold:
1) You’re looking in the wrong places.
If you’re only meeting people at bars or clubs, then you’re likely to run into some self-centered characters. Instead, try joining a meetup group or taking up a new hobby where you can meet like-minded individuals. You may have more success finding someone who shares your interests and values when you expand your horizons.
2) You’re attracted to the wrong type of person.
If you constantly find yourself drawn to emotionally unavailable people or just plain wrong for you, then it might be good to reassess your type. Maybe you’re attracted to the excitement of an unavailable partner, or perhaps you’re attracted to qualities that you yourself lack.
Whatever the reason, it’s better to be honest with yourself about the type of person you’re attracted to and why. Only you can set ground rules, break the attraction cycle, and begin meeting better matches.
3. You have a “dating fatigue” experience.
You’ve been in physical separation, and you’ve been Tinder-ed out. You’ve been ghosted and breadcrumbed enough times to know that the games people play are not worth your time.
You’re starting to feel like you’ll never meet someone who is actually interested in a healthy relationship. But that doesn’t mean giving up easily on dating.
There are still plenty of kind and independent men out there looking for something real. As a piece of relationship advice, keep your head up and don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve. You’ll find someone eventually, and when you do, it will all be worth it.
4. You have trust issues.
When you are rejected, you tend to close off your space.
The solution isn’t to take a relationship break or treat every man as a criminal. When you choose charismatic cheating scumbags who aren’t looking for anything serious in return, the problem lies within yourself.
But hey, you don’t have to be one of them if you’re smart enough not to. Trust that you are worthy of love and happiness. It’s time to let go of your fear and start finding that one partner who wants to be you for the rest of your life.
5. You’re afraid to settle down.
What’s not okay is maintaining a casual relationship with somebody while having an intensely emotional or romantic relationship with them. Being single is not bad, nor is it a good choice.
But it’s a big deal in terms of relationship breaks. It may seem to be an unfair side if this is your only option while letting them develop feelings with you.
6. Your self-esteem is suffering.
When your self-esteem suffers, it can show up in your relationships. You might find yourself withdrawing or being less assertive than usual.
If this sounds familiar, it might be time to take a relationship hiatus. This doesn’t mean that you’re giving up on love, but it does mean that you’re spending time for yourself.
During this hiatus, focus on healing your self-esteem and mental health. Do things that will make you happy and build you up instead of tearing you down. When you’re ready, you can jump back into the dating pool with a refreshed sense of self-worth.
If you’re experiencing any of these six problems, it might be time for a hiatus. Of course, this isn’t to say that breaking up is always the answer – but it can certainly help if things aren’t going well.
The essential thing is to be honest with yourself and your partner about how you’re feeling. Remember, there’s no shame in admitting that a relationship isn’t working. It takes two healthy people to make a good relationship work.